Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Mail of another kind. . .

Ok, so yesterday it was email and not real mail, but enjoyable just the same. Here is this hilarious debacle. So I get this email from someone I don’t recognize the email address, but the subject line has the name of a guy I used to date, so I was too curious NOT to read it. It is kinda hard to read, and lots of spelling and grammar mistakes, but she was furiously angry while typing it (obviously) and she uses lots of . . . but try to follow. Here is the email:

Subject: Todd (I left this blank to protect the innocent) DON'T date this Loser...white trash...
Ladies, let me tell you from first hand experience (try dating him for about 2 yrs) what a complete and utter loser he is...and for those of you who want to date, know someone who would ever want to date him...want to set him up with a good friend...do not..that is unless you/they want to be lied to, cheated on, and used...and all-in-all date a world class selfish prick...
Oh, and let's not forget some of the other classic "todd" things he's done......you end up paying for dinner because he's always broke...yet he can afford a $900.00 assalut rifle... a trip to vegas... sushi dinners with his new "friends"(they happen to be female and you never meet them)...
...one of my personal favs...having him make out with your sister...
...leaving you to take care of a "mistake" you both made, while he works his job at Wal-Mart...
...borrowing money he'll NEVER pay back...
...actually catching him with someone else and his response be "...well, you should have called first..."
...having a "friend" (he's not sleeping with...HAHA... that's a good one) call you, freaking out b/c she saw a sweatshirt of mine...
...and let's not forget the little "friends" he leaves behind...
the list goes on and on...please ask him about all of these and then some...because i don't lie...
for those of you who are dating him...dont' fool yourslef into thinking your the only one...sorry, but i hope some of this helps...
some of you are asking why i stayed for so long...the best bullshit ever...he told me he loved me... =)

The very next email is from him somewhat explaining the situation. Poor guy :(

Subject: Drama!
Hi Everybody, Well, as you can all see... "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!" That's what I get for having gone out with a psycho chick. Sorry that she had to drag everyone I know into my ancient drama. I apologize to all of you that had to be subjected to the insanity. If you have any questions... Please feel free to contact Chris (hahahahaha). He has agreed to speak on my behalf.... Thanks Chris.... HAHAHAHAHA! Oh... don't worry... I don't think you can catch the "psycho bug" from an email you read... You should be safe. Please trash any future email you might receive from that person... (It does make for entertaining reading though, doesn't it? HAHAHAHAHA!) I hope everyone is well... Todd.

I feel like I need to defend him a little. I think he is a stand up guy and do not believe or understand a lot of what that girl said. In fact I still don’t even know who she is, or have ANY idea how she knew me, my email address or that I dated him. But just thought this whole thing was too hilarious not share.

Hope your enjoy!